The best of intentions

Well so much for getting a jump start on the Fall of Fitness.

Again, I failed to get up in time to ride my bike to work.

Oh well. It's not Fall yet. Get off me!

The good news is ... its Friday. You know what that means. This afternoon, I will perform my weekly dulling of the senses ritual.

First, I treat myself to a midday glass of wine. I'm so civilized and European. Then, I will swallow two friendly blue pills, insert my peep innards, and cover my eyes with black satin.

I have to get through the day here though, before the magic can happen.

I am particularly anxious to try another season of fitness because this week, a lady I know but hadn't seem since last summer asked if I had gained weight.

"A little, maybe," I hedged. "Well, you better watch it," she replied. "If you get any bigger, you'll lose your figure."

Good advice, perhaps. And she's old, a senior citizen, in fact, so free to speak her mind. But PISS! I like it better when people feed my illusions ... especially if they serve McNuggets on the side.

However, since that encounter, I've had time to think. This is the same woman who once believed her grand-niece and I were carrying on a torrid sex affair.

Not that there's anything wrong with that. But if you know me and Lolita, you know there probably aren't two women who are quite as heterosexual as either of us. Lo will concur, I'm sure.

So, maybe Aunt Pearl sees only the opposite of the truth, and for reals, I'm rivaling Lindsay Lohan when it comes to being skinny!! I better eat a sandwich right now.

Until later, love and kisses, xoxoxoxo