The Realm

A Place Where Cheese Is Queen

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Location: San Francisco, CA

I'm fun.

Monday, July 28, 2008

This and That

Hello Monday!

I have a new pet of sorts! She is very quiet and undemanding. In fact, she doesn't move from one place. But its not because she's lazy ... it's because she is an orchid!

She (i THINK it's a she, because she's so pretty) has three white blooms and a few little buds and lives on my bedside table. She is the first thing I see when I wake up! Looking at flowers first thing in the morning is quite a nice way to start the day. I highly recommend it.

My friend Terry appeared in a special dance recital this weekend! It was all very exciting. She has been studying the hula now for a couple of years and this was her first performance! Through an unfortunate comedy of errors, I missed the dancing part of the show BUT I did get to see her all dressed up and pretty in one of her special performance outfits.

Despite the fact that I missed the dancing it was still fun, AND I got to see part of the city that I am not normally stomping around in. It was lovely. I am inspired to do more exploring. Although my home and its contents conspire to work against me - it can be difficult getting up and off the couch when it is humming its little siren song 'stay, stay, lay on me all day' ... gah. We'll see what happens.

xoxoxo love and flowery kisses xoxoxoxo

Thursday, July 24, 2008

You Learn Something New Sometimes

Yesterday was one of those days. That I learned something new, that is.

And it is something REALLY NEAT AND FUN!

There is a creek (a "crick" for all y'all Or-uh-Goan-e-uhns) running through the backyard of the house I grew up in, which remains the home of Dick and Sally. It is pretty neato because there are all kinds of birds that make their homes there hatching out BABY BIRDS and teaching them to swim and stuff. Is there anything cuter than a baby duck? I think not. However, there is one little water creature that comes close. That would be - the Baby River Otter:

GAW he is cute. Well, there's been a run of baby river otters here in the Bay Area, and of course accompanying news footage of them gamboling about in wading pools and scampering around yards and whatnot.

WELL I was talking to my dad yesterday and gushing on about these little snorgables and he says - "oh yeah, we had a pair of river otters in the creek down there about five years ago." Like it WAS NOTHING!

My first reaction was - why the hell didn't you go catch one of the babies and throw it the tub. I mean REALLY Dick.

I can't believe I was potentially so close to fulfilling one of my animal dreams (playing with a baby otter). Oh well. I GUESS I'll get over it.

But when dolphins come to the creek - I want to be notified immediately.

xoxox little whiskery otter baby kisses xoxoxo

Wednesday, July 23, 2008


It is three thirtyish AM and I've been up for two and a half hours. Getting a jump on my day, sure - but why can't I just sleep like a normal human being? gah.

On the other hand, I'm halfway done to being ready for work and i'm going to have time to get donuts on the way there! Yesterday was so horrible that I promised my coworker today would be better - no matter what. He asked how in the world I could make such a promise - and I replied - there will be donuts!! so even if the four horsemen show up and we can't get anyone relevant to talk about it on a good phone line within 17 seconds, at least we'll have a little treat.

Noodle and Carlos have a special public service announcement from the Animal Kingdom:


xoxo love, kisses and massive amounts of spilled kibble xoxo

Monday, July 21, 2008


I am, a little, right now!

That's because this seminar on mindful meditation and spiritual growth I had hoped to attend in Las Vegas this year is not within my financial reach. DAMMIT.

It sounded like my kind of thing too. Mind expansion by day, male strippers by night. But, alas, it is not to be. I am sorry, but I'm not paying for a hotel room on top of the cost of the conference and transit there as well. I would if I was rolling in it, but as you know, one of the main watchwords in the Realm of Cheese is Frugality - so.

The good news is, I am planning an alternative trip. I'm thinking a Zen retreat with horses somehow involved. Or maybe a yoga spa. We'll see.

So to counter all this with something happy - hmmm ... let's see. Nothing's coming to mind at the moment.

Oh I know. I get to go to the gym today!!! yeah. okay ... I am going to see Mamma Mia next week! I already have the date for it. Now THAT is exciting.

Also, I have a new dress to wear to work tomorrow. AND I'm getting my hair done. I also have two of those donut style peaches in my refrigerator which are SUPER delicious and quite firm. It is a requirement of mine that all fruits that grow on trees must be firm, or I will not eat it.

Here is today's poem:

It must be firm, the fruit i eat
not too juicy, not too sweet
hard to the touch and to the taste
or else it will just go to waste.

xoxoxo love and kisses! xoxoxo

Thursday, July 17, 2008


My good friend who is temporarily clippled has updated her blog.

So she's writing about commitmentphobia when it comes to blogging.

I have that as well. In fact, I'm pretty much an all around commitment-phobe. It kinda sucks. Especially since I'm committed to things in so many areas of my life, now that I'm grownup, or whatever. I am constantly being pulled in two directions between responsibility and decadence.

Anyway, I'm backish. Thanks for inspiration, Magic Baby Hands. (That is my friend's nickname, so given because her hands are freakishly small, yet enormously talented.)

I'm not gong to say this foray back into the Land of Cheese is permanent. It may not even be of any measurable length.

You know what they say. If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it'll probably crap on your head.

I mean, if it comes back, then it was meant to be.

All kidding aside, I love that little nugget of wisdom and find it very comforting. It absolves one of responsibility and I like that above all things.

Noodle and Carlos M are doing great! They got a cat dancer toy yesterday. Freaking Carlos was SCARED of it.

Man, he's a pussy.

Me, MBH and MMBH (mini magic baby hands) have this super fun Thursday night tradition. It involves me going over to their house, all of us cursing at each other and making crude hand gestures for awhile, then watching the CBS Summer hit show "Swingtown" (featuring "Frequency: A Mural") and eating some delicious snack. IT IS SO MUCH FUN!!

That said, tonight (it's Thursday) it ain't happening due to a commitment on the part of MMBH. Oh well.

It's been five months of (mostly) not smoking! I am also eating nice, healthy foods in reasonable portions, doing lots of yoga and going to the gym.

Yesterday, I stepped on the scale and learned that I had gained SEVEN pounds.

GOD DAMMIT. WHAT THE HELL?? It doesn't seem fair. SEVEN pounds is not a small amount. That is one and a half pounds more than Noodle weighs all together. I have gained one and one quarter Noodles!!! Shit.

I HAVE A PLAN. Stay tuned.

xoxoxoxo fresh, fat hugs and kisses xoxoxoxo

Monday, April 07, 2008

Heh heh

From the coolest website in the whole world, of course.

xoxoxo pug love and licks xoxoxo

Friday, April 04, 2008

baby FROOT

This is a baby pineapple.

He was given to me as a gift from Angela.

His name is spike.

He's SO cute!!!

xoxoxo until later xoxoxo