The Realm

A Place Where Cheese Is Queen

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Location: San Francisco, CA

I'm fun.

Tuesday, April 17, 2007

Mostly Excellent News

Well the first thing I want to say is just another Thank You for all your happy thoughts re: Noodle.

I took her to the vet for her post-hospitalization re-check and the vet was very impressed at her improvement! She is doing really good and feels tons better. Now if only Carlos M. would stop bugging her, her life would be absolutely perfect.

The only yucky part is that because of the cost of Noodle's x-rays, overnight hospitalization and medicines, my Mickey money is gone. Unfortunately, I can't go to Disneyland as planned! Wah!! But that is a small price to pay for peace of mind regarding Noodle. I am just stressing out because I feel like a flake. However, I'm sure my oldest friend and my favorite ten year old will understand. I hope. Of course they will!!

In other cheese ...

I had a STUPID and HIGHLY IRRITATING encounter at the laundromat last week with the formerly 46 pound drunk woman. She has recently spent some time in the hospital, so now she probably tips the scales at about 68 pounds. Good for her! Except she is a total FREAK. I returned to the laundromat from hell because I noticed that the asshole gauntlet has re-located its headquarters to outside the new "Syn Lounge" (the old "Monkey Club," seriously now, who the hell's going to say "hey baby, meet me at the Monkey" OR "see you at Syn Lounge baby" can't they just give it a NORMAL name?) down the street. Anywayz. So I took some articles that won't fit into my kind friends' washers down to clean them ... and ended up regretting it.

Because the 68 pound drunk lady STOLE MY KEYS!!

She let me look all over the laundry room for them (I had left them on top of the washer I was using while I went to the change machine) then beckoned me to follow her outside. That's when she handed me her jacket all crumpled up and said "did you lose something?" I took my keys but she still managed to extort two dollars from me. You want to know why? Because, as pissed as I was (and she told me she took them to keep someone else, specifically a woman sleeping on a laundromat bench, from taking them) I just didn't want to Start Something. Although I nearly changed my mind when she followed me back inside, went over to the sleeping woman and they both started giggling like maniacs.

I can't wait until the universe provides me with my own giant washing machine.

xoxoxo well little purrs and snortles xoxoxoxo

Friday, April 06, 2007


(dateline: hampshire street, saturday afternoon)Noodle has come home from the hospital and is feeling a bit better! We are still trying to determine what's made her sick but I am currently medicating her and employing lifestyle changes in an effort to make sure she gets better. THANK YOU for all your good thoughts and love!! I know it helped her a LOT. :o)!!!


I need it, please!

All you lovely people who kindly check in to see my little Chronicle of Cheese ... will you please think good thoughts, send white light, pray ... whatever your personal version of invoking the power of the Universe ... for my little Noodle?

She is SICK!! Here's the good news ... the vet thinks she will be okay. The bad news: She has been diagnosed with bronchial disease and is in the hospital! she has to stay there over night tonight so she has access to oxygen! The doctor thinks her problem is either a chronic bacterial infection, asthma or something horrible called lungworm.

I know she'll be all right but every little bit of love helps.

I posted a picture (FINALLY she let me take one!! from just two days ago) to help you focus.

xoxoxo grateful, thankful hugs and kisses!! xoxoxoxo

Wednesday, April 04, 2007


I titled my post yesterday "New Leaf" then totally forgot what I wanted to say about it!!

My POINT is that I am a turning over a new leaf and going to try to update this little Chronicle a bit more often.

I decided to do that because I spent some time re-reading past entries and realized I had forgotten just about everything that happened in my life over the last 19-20 odd months. So I have to write it down just to remember it.

I'm such a DING A LING!! Spring of the Ding Ding Ding-a-Ling!

Here's today's DING moment:

I was standing in Starbucks this morning and I witnessed the same "baristo" who gave me a dressing down for illicit pastry caressing a few months ago bitch out someone different for asking for a coffee with cream and sugar.

"We go through this EVERY DAY! The CREAM and SUGAR are OVER THERE!! YOU have to add them YOURSELF!!"

Wow. Clearly, someone needs to cut down on the caffeine. Talk about your on the job hazard.

Here's a PSA: McDONALD's puts the cream and sugar in the coffee for you.

Anna strapped the teacups in their new jogging stroller and we took them out for a spin yesterday. They had super fun!! I also got to visit with big brother Donovan for a little bit. In pre-school, he learned that hands are not for hitting. Good job, D!! Then he says, all sotto voce, but feet are for kicking.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha oh how i lauged.

xoxoxo love and kisses, no hitting but maybe a little kick xoxoxoxo

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

New Leaf

Okay so the equinox happened a couple of weeks ago ... but what the hell. There is still time to Name the Season.

I thought ... Hope SPRINGS Eternal ... but then, no. TOO FRIGGING gehhhgey. I mean, yes. I am a happy flowery person but COME ON. I have my limits.

So, here are the contenders:

Spring of Ding Ding
Spring of Snoozy Snuggles
Spring into Fitness and Frugality (ha ha HA)
Spring of the WILD FLING!!

My choice, of course, would be S of the WF BUT in order to make that happen I need to make an Effort. Sorry, fling fans. However, because I SHOULD be taking a stab at having a life, that means I also have to eliminate Snoozy Snuggles as an option. poo. Also, I don't want to be fit OR frugal. I reject that paradigm.

SO ... by the process of elimination I give you ... the Spring of Ding Ding.

At first glance, it seems pretty useless because Ding Ding doesn't really mean anything. But, here's an interesting and handy paradox: something that has no meaning conversely has ALL THE MEANING IN THE WORLD. You know what I'm leading up to. YES. I am one step closer to the Hampshire Street Geek Collective's common goal of total global domination.

Noodle got a bath last night. She was NOT a happy camper but let me dry her off with the hairdryer. She also got a comb-out. I will try to take her picture today if she'll let me. She's quite shy. Little teeny NOODLES. Just five small pounds. Carlos, on the other hand, weighs about 86 million pounds. His birthday is in three months. He's going to be the size of a capybara by the time he's done if he doesn't stop growing.

I am planning a trip to Disneyland. Stay tuned.

xoxoxoxo love and dingdings xoxoxo

Monday, April 02, 2007

Raise your Hand

If you're a GIANT geek!

You are in good company! I mean, if you like me, that is. If not, that would not be very happy.

It's Monday, late afternoon and I have not yet had my siesta! I stayed up so I could check in with the criminal courts of SF to see if I need to report to jury duty tomorrow. I was all sorted to go straight to bed after finding out ...until the phone rang just now. It was my good friend Tex, ringing up to remind me the bachelor is on tonight. I wrote that in teeny letters because that is how she said it to me. Because it is so embarassing that we watch that show. I concur. I'm terribly embarassed. but whatevs. I mean the world knows of my addiction to America's Next Top Model and for whatever reason, that's not embarassing at all. RIGHT???

Speaking of ANTM, if you would like to read the funniest recaps of that show on the internet just visit this blog. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ah ah eh yeah.

Sadly, I have no photos to share of last weekend. Would you believe, I didn't take any? I really didn't, except for ones where we are in our pajamas and we are all bloogy. BUT here are some pics of MR. CARLOS MUFFIN to tide all y'all over:

Here is Carlos thinking about maybe playing with me. He is not sure it is a good idea.

Here he is hiding from the freaky lady who likes to play. Sorry Carlos!! I found you!!

Sorry, no pics of Noodle this time. She is busy trying to decide whether or not to try the new, expensive safe and poison free wet cat food I trucked my ass to the health food store to get after work today. Speaking of, I also got them some organic treats which not even Carlos M will touch. GAH! If they were people, we'd be eating chicken mcnuggets every day. (not that there's anything wrong with that.)

I am a multi tasker and as I was typing all this cheese down and posting pictures and whatnot, I found out I don't have to go to the jury thing tomorrow. So I get to go to work, instead! Hooray! I'm glad because there is going to be a birthday party.

xoxoxoxo purring little hugs xoxoxoxo