For the LAST TIME
I DON'T dance!!
JEEZIMINY!
Do you remember ... my little story ... about the lady who works here who made a special point recently of telling me what GREAT SEX she had the night before?
She strikes again! This time ... I'm not the only victim. She picked out another person to tell and I heard it from across the room. I was cringing, but also glad, because I thought I was off the hook for her vile braggings, inappropriate questions and scary, unsolicited advice.
Alas, that was not to be.
A few minutes later, horny lady approached my desk.
Oversexed Freak Lady (OSL): I got LAID last night honey.
Me: oh ... that's nice
OSL: It is WONDERFUL, you really need to get laid too. I mean, come on. I'm just telling you, as an older woman, it really keeps you vital. It gives you a spark. Look at these other women my age ... they're so ... dull. It's because they're not getting any!
Me: Oh ... uh, yeah ... I don't ... yeah ... um ...
OSL: If you don't have a boyfriend, honey ... that's okay! You owe it yourself to get yourself some ... find a friend to screw ... or have sex with yourself!! Whatever it takes!!
Me: yes, well ... yeah, I have two fuzzy little kitties that sleep with me ...
OSL: (pitying look) Okay honey ....
Then she STROKED MY HEAD!
Luckily, a shocked co-worker intervened to ask her a pretend question in order to get her off my back. WHY??? Why me?
It's kind of funny afterward, but oh so horrible while it's happening. Kind of like fire-walking or something. Except I feel dirty inside, as opposed to cleansed.
**********************************************************
In other cheese ... I put velvet and sparkly collars on Noodle and Carlos. Noodle's collar is red velvet with silver sparkles. She has a round gold I-D tag. Carlos' is black velvet with silver. His tag is red and shaped like a heart.
Yeah yeah, i know.
I need to get laid.
hah hah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha eh ...
xoxoxoxo appropriate hugs and kisses!!! xoxoxo
JEEZIMINY!
Do you remember ... my little story ... about the lady who works here who made a special point recently of telling me what GREAT SEX she had the night before?
She strikes again! This time ... I'm not the only victim. She picked out another person to tell and I heard it from across the room. I was cringing, but also glad, because I thought I was off the hook for her vile braggings, inappropriate questions and scary, unsolicited advice.
Alas, that was not to be.
A few minutes later, horny lady approached my desk.
Oversexed Freak Lady (OSL): I got LAID last night honey.
Me: oh ... that's nice
OSL: It is WONDERFUL, you really need to get laid too. I mean, come on. I'm just telling you, as an older woman, it really keeps you vital. It gives you a spark. Look at these other women my age ... they're so ... dull. It's because they're not getting any!
Me: Oh ... uh, yeah ... I don't ... yeah ... um ...
OSL: If you don't have a boyfriend, honey ... that's okay! You owe it yourself to get yourself some ... find a friend to screw ... or have sex with yourself!! Whatever it takes!!
Me: yes, well ... yeah, I have two fuzzy little kitties that sleep with me ...
OSL: (pitying look) Okay honey ....
Then she STROKED MY HEAD!
Luckily, a shocked co-worker intervened to ask her a pretend question in order to get her off my back. WHY??? Why me?
It's kind of funny afterward, but oh so horrible while it's happening. Kind of like fire-walking or something. Except I feel dirty inside, as opposed to cleansed.
**********************************************************
In other cheese ... I put velvet and sparkly collars on Noodle and Carlos. Noodle's collar is red velvet with silver sparkles. She has a round gold I-D tag. Carlos' is black velvet with silver. His tag is red and shaped like a heart.
Yeah yeah, i know.
I need to get laid.
hah hah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha eh ...
xoxoxoxo appropriate hugs and kisses!!! xoxoxo
posted by Queen of Cheese | 9:36 AM
5 Comments:
(let's try this again. blogger ate my comment!)
i don't know what i want to do more -- laugh or throw up.
EEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHH!
i'm so sorry you had to endure this. but it's fucking hilarious.
Thats kinda creepy...
I'm sooooooooooo glad I don't work with that lady. She patted your head? That's so.... wrong.
We must have a picture of the sparkly collars soon. What are ou going to get them for Valentine's Day??
I saw your comments on Jmai's blog, thought I would come on over .
Hope you show us pics with the new collars.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
freak, she is a freak.
poor didi.
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